my life

so i have been absent from my blog..... I have been busy.

i feel like i need to write down my life right now for some reason. At this point in my life it is chaos and messes, but I would like to remember it someday.

So here it goes.... day in the life of SUZIE.

it is around 8:00 and my kids are whining for me to get up and make them breakfast. I know i need to get up so that i can get everything that i need to get done for the day and still have naptime, and Curious George is about to start and my kids get mad at me if they miss it. So I say a quick prayer for patience  then i grudgingly get out of bed and put in my contacts, so i can see the toys on the floor instead of tripping on them. My kids think that i am putting in my eyes.... what ever, too tired to explain. I go and get Sam out of bed and scold him for being a newborn and waking up 2 times during the night. He just smiles and laughs at me. I then have to change his stinky, poopy diaper. It is disgusting. I mean who wants to wake up every morning to and change a poopy diaper? Not me. Ugh. Now that i stink like number 2 we head down stairs to make breakfast. I turn on the tv and they jump on the couch for their George fix. I think about making a warm breakfast, maybe eggs or cream of wheat but think better of it and pour cereal in a bowl and milk in their cups and set it on the floor in front of the tv and tell them to eat. They plop on the floor not once taking their eyes off the tv. Sam sittings on the floor and proceeds to eat with his face in the bowl. Yep. Mother of the year award right here! I fix Neal breakfast and his lunch then with a prayer he is gone. As i watch with envy has his car drives away i take a deep breath and tell myself that i can do this. I have to shut the door or my escapee will be gone before i blink. Finally George is over and it is chore time. They don't have a lot of chores but every morning they have to make their beds, say their prayers, read their scriptures and clean their room. It is really not that hard but you would think that i told them to move the house, they way they complain and whine. Now i am not the most patient person so it takes all i have just to not scream and lock the door. There are days when the whining is minimal but that is rare. I try to make my bed and read my scriptures also. Trying to feel the spirit while kids are fighting and screaming is like trying to wash clothes in mud.... think about that. But i try and even a little bit if spirit is better then nothing.
After chores are done it is "school" time. I use the word loosely though because it really is not school. The only thing that could remotely be like school is when we start.
I have one of the kids pick a primary song and we sing. then that kids prays (need to work on our prayers, they laugh when they bless the food and there is no food.) We then learn the primary scripture for the month and the song for the month. Then i feel like i am teaching them something. After that i will either read a story from the Friend or teach them something that i feel they need to learn. Like this week we talked about the life of Jesus and Easter. After i have them write something about what we talked about in their journals. okay it is more like scribbles and it is usually Jesus they draw but I am proud. :) Getting anything done with a 18 month old running, screaming, tearing things up and just plain demanding attention is tough. I deserve a medal!
Okay so if that is all i do for school then i feel pretty good about myself. Some days we do more. I usually try to have 2 or 3 activities planned so i feel like i am doing something. Work books are awesome and my kids love them. Games are fun. I try to read to them a lot. If there is still time before lunch, they love to cook(make messes).
After lunch of usually a sandwich i do a little jig because it is Naptime! I MADE IT! :) YES! I put Sam in his crib, Jacob downstairs with his video game and threats of nap if i hear him and I lay with emma as she takes a nap. I usually read a book. Seriously i love naptime!
Nap lasts 1.5 to 2 hours, depending on Sam. Yeah i know that kid runs the house i swear!
After nap i either take them to the park or let them play outside. Once i make it to dinner time I know I am almost there! After Dinner is Bathtime, scripture time and then blessed bed time. Sam is always down by 7 pm and I let the kids watch one show on Netflix for sleeping the whole night in their own rooms... Yeah i know, but it works. it also gives me time to clean the kitchen from the tornado that was SAM! He throws all this food on the floor and I don't think he gets any in his mouth.
After the kids get in bed, Neal and I watch tv. Yep we are that exciting. By 9 I am almost gone so we head off to bed. I thank my Heavenly Father that we are still alive and that i wasn't too mean that day, and that i get to have one more day with my kids.
So this is what most days are like, not all days. There are days when i text my sister and ask if she can watch the kids while I run away (aka running for 1.5 miles then coming back). I love her and I am grateful for her every day. There are days when i just pile them all in the car and go to target just to get out of the house. I am not perfect. Oh well. Good thing my kids love me anyways.

Homeschooling is not easy and it is not something i ever pictured myself doing, there are days when i have to keep myself from quitting and sometimes the only thing i rely on is faith. Faith in myself and Faith in my Father in Heaven. Faith in Him comes easy. I know He can do anything. Faith in myself is more difficult. I only notice my faults. I am too lazy and weak, I am not smart enough or strong enough..... yada yada yada. I am trying to focus on my strengths. I have learned so much about myself these past 3 months then i have in a long time. I know that i thrive with a schedule, I do well when i know what is to be done. Having a clean house helps my mind be clear. That does not mean it is always clean, far from it. I have learned that i love my kids so much more then i thought i would. This time i spend with them i know I will always cherish and I have faith i will only remember the good parts. This is my life and I am going to enjoy it just the way it is right now.